When you make me feel lonely
by Luna Vaile
Summary: All Lucy feels is loneliness. Today is like any day; crying over a pink-haired salamander. But when she finds out that the salamander is going to marry a white haired girl, she will make a choice that will change her life forever...Please R and R! :
1. Chapter 1

**Hi! This is a one short story and I hope you all like it! XD No worries, this one short will be long so...yay for those who love reading! Natsu and Lucy forever but for this story I wanted a bit of twist so sorry for those who felt angry about the ending T.T All characters name belong to Mashima Hiro, I am only using her characters name. Please Read and Review! **

**When you make me feel lonely**

"Why…W-Why do I have to fall for that idiot?" I sobbed, hugging my pillow and burying my face in it. My instincts had proven me wrong and I thought that maybe…maybe the relationship between him and I would blossom into something more than just nakama. But…I was wrong. I punched my pillow and cried in anger; I should have known! How could I not have? Lisanna was always the best choice for Natsu; she was intelligent, beautiful, sweet, loving, caring and unlike me who whine all day or screaming at him to get out of my apartment. Lisanna possessed all the characteristics that I lacked and she definitely was not the type to go into an emotional breakdown. Most importantly, she was not a damsel in distress.

"Lucy?" a worried voice called out. It was Levy. Putting on a practiced smile, I wiped away all of my pathetic tears. "Hiya! Anything the matter?" I asked putting in a lot of effort to keep the smile going as I opened the door to a blue-haired girl.

"N…No…I thought I heard something…"Levy said, her eyes held confusion. My smile twitched a little and I laughed, "You must be hearing things Levy!" In returned she gave me a sheepish smile saying, "Yeah, you're probably right."

"Hmm…What was it that you wanted to ask?"

"Erm…today is Natsu's and Lisanna's wedding. I have the invitation cards with me…it's at the forest…maybe we can go together?" Levy asked timidly. My jaw dropped, I could feel the tears threatening to spill out from my eyes. _Wedding? I have never heard that…they were getting married? Was I still their nakama?_

"Uh…Lu-chan?" Levy asked seeing my stunned features. "

"Y-Yeah…Of course! I…Just give me a moment will ya? I need to prepare," I stuttered. Levy stared blankly at my face before bursting out into tears crying, "I'm sooooo SORRY! I…I should have known how you would feel!"

"It's fine…really!" I assured her or I tried to. Biting my lip, I hope that she would not dwell on this subject any further. However, Levy continued rattling, "No! I should have realized earlier. The relationship between Natsu and Lisanna would affect you greatly; I mean first the dating, then the engagement and followed by the wedding. I should have known something was amiss from the time when we caught them kiss-"

"STOP IT!" I shouted silencing her. My fingers were clenched and the tears started to pool out of my eyes. Levy's eyes bulged in shock and fear. Immediately, I regretted my decision, "I-I am sorry…but please…just leave me alone," I begged. She nodded her head before running away in tears.

"I'm such a jerk," I murmured before laughing in my mind. _Yeah stupid Lucy! You're a fool. This ain't right for you; settle you're feelings once and for all! _"Yeah, settle it once and for all…" I mumbled.

Rummaging through my wardrobe, I found the dress which I had been looking for. It was a red satin dress but after a few seconds, I tossed it to the bed. No…I wanted to wear something that would make them…especially he to remember me. I had to congratulate them after all.

Finally, I decided to wear the outfit I had always worn to the guild; light blue and white top with dark blue mini skirt and black boots. I picked a blue ribbon and tied a small sideway ponytail; my signature look. I had to do this; I needed him to know how I feel towards him even if it was a false hope. It was empty without him…his laughter, his idiotic smile. He even stopped coming to my apartment after they dated…and I was kicked out of their team. I walked out of my room and spotted a pink card; it seemed that Levy had left the invitation card here after all. Clutching the card in my hands, I gave myself a bitter laugh as I remembered.

(Flashback)

"Hey Luce! I –uh…I was wondering if Lisanna could take over your place, I mean, I want to make up for the times that we had lost. After all we used to make a great team!" Natsu said as he gave me a goofy grin. Replace me with Lisanna? My body went numb with pain, my heart felt like it had been stabbed by daggers. "I-I am just a …replacement?" I croaked, my throat had a huge lump and I could barely breathe.

"Not replaced. Think of it as an opportunity, going solo allows you to boost your physical attributes and magical powers too. One should be independent once in a while, "Erza smiled. Was I that weak to them that they had to kick me off? "I…I know I'm weak but I'll try…I'll try to be stronger s-so don't a-abandon me kay?" I stuttered.

"Don't worry Lucy, we're giving you a chance to become stronger. You can form with wither guild members as a team if you're afraid. We don't mind, once you become stronger you can probably take missions wit us!" Gray tried o cheer me up. _Excuses! Admit it, you just want me out!_ "O-Okay" I said and tried to put on a smile though it hurts.

-flashback ends—

I had not realized that I had reached the guild_. Okay, you're doing fine girl!_ I assured myself although my hands are trembling. I spotted Natsu wearing a tux greeting everyone that came and beside him was Gray chosen to be the best man. Gathering up courage, I walked towards him. When has it been since I last spoken to him? One week? One month? One year? "Congratulations! I wish you and Lisanna an everlasting love and happiness!" I exclaimed. Deep in my heart, these were not the words that I wanted to say but still-

"Thanks Luce!" Natsu said before giving me a hug. I gave him a small smile before settling down next to Levy. She stared at me, surprised. I nodded meekly at her and said, "Change of ideas." Tears welled up in Levy's eyes and she squealed before embracing me tightly. Just then, a chime of bells rang synchronizing together to form the most melodious and memorable sound in my life. The church door flew open and we were greeted first by Mirajane, Lisanna's sister and also the bridesmaid. She was gracefully spreading the red flowers around. After her was Erza who was holding a bunch of carnations, daisies, roses and dandelions in her hands and she sauntered with confidence. Lastly, it was Lisanna the star of this whole occasion; she was wearing a simple yet stunning wedding dress with her snowy-white hair braided up and a sapphire-jeweled tiara rested n her head. She hooked her arms with Elfman, her brother and she gracefully walked on the red carpet with each second getting more and more beautiful and mesmerizing. Lucy felt her heart contract.

"Do you Lisanna Strauss take Natsu Dragoneel to be your husband to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do you apart?" asked the priest.

"I do."

"And do you Natsu Dragoneel take Lisanna Strauss to be your wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do you apart?"

"I do." I coughed a little.

"If there are no objections to this wedding…then I pronounce you husband and wife. The groom may now kiss his bride," the priest said. With that, the whole of the guild members erupted into cheers and laughter. Jealousy choked my breaths and tampered my heart. _I should be the one with Natsu, people should be cheering for OUR wedding!_ I grimaced a little when they kissed, my hands clutching my skirt for support.

A few hours after the wedding, I started towards Natsu who seemed to be enjoying alone after from all the countless of congratulations. Lisanna was crowded by the women of the guild do I took this opportunity. "Natsu, can we go somewhere I have something important to tell you," I said.

"What is it that you want to tell me? Can't we talk here?'

"No..It is something VERY important."

"Erm…Okay!" he replied and grinned. I winced; a few months ago my heart would melt at his smile but now, I could only feel pain and loneliness. Luckily, the wedding was held in a forest (he wanted to be closer to Igneel). Taking him deep into the forest, we came to the edge of a cliff. I sucked in my breath and braced for the coming. "So Luce, what's so important that we can't talk back there?" Natsu asked raising his eyebrows.

"Natsu…I love you," I confessed. His jaw dropped and he laughed awkwardly. "Is this a joke?" I clenched my fists and snarled, "No!" He flinched a little at my sudden menacing tone. From laughing to surprise face and to a frown. "I'm sorry, but you know that i married Lisanna because I love her," Natsu whispered.

Pain coursed through my body, this was worse than my previous ones. Natsu rejected me, I can't take it. I felt my legs wobbled and I gave him a bitter smile before asking, "Will you still remember me even if I'm dead?"

"Natsu's eyes widened and her shouted, "Hell-no! What are you thinking Luce?"

The end of my life was nearing and I could feel the cold hands of death waiting to claim my soul. "Natsu what are you doing here? Everyone's waiting for-"Gray paused as he came into the clearing.

"Lucy?" his eyes widen in disbelief.

"See you," I mummured as I gave them a sad smile. Gray raised his eyebrows in confusion and Natsu tried to grab my sleeve but missed by an inch. So close yet so far. Goodbye. I let myself fall away from the cliff and a drop of tear flow from my cheek. I closed my eyes, welcoming the hands of death and the eternal oblivion that awaits me. _Natsu, do you know? When you make me feel lonely, my heart was like burnt into ashes. Of course you don't understand._ Then, darkness closed in.

….

The death of Lucy Heartfillia did not seem to affect a great deal out of everyone. It somehow seemed…natural to them. They had come out of the excuse that she missed her parents and wanted to be with them. Although Natsu mourned for her, he gradually forgot about her and perhaps her existence. A year later, Natsu and Lisanna had a baby girl which they named Lillia.

…

(Five years later)

"Where's Lillia?" Lisanna asked anxiously. Lillia had gone out to play with Mizuki the son of Gray and Juvia. Mizuki had come back alone and was crying, "I'm s-sorry…i…lost her in the forest…" Lisanna's face went deathly pale and Natsu's face was filled with worry, he knew that Mizuki was only a child and cound not blame him but he was still kind of angry.

"Mama! Papa!" a pink-haired girl cried out as she ran forward to hug Lisanna and Natsu. Everyone heaved a sigh of relief as their guild's precious princess had come back unhurt.

"Next time, you're not allowed to go out without my permission!" Lisanna scolded lightly while pinching her daughter's nose gently. Lillia only cried harder. "It must have been a scary experience for her, try to go easy on her," Erza smiled as she rubbed her bulging stomach. She was pregnant with Jellal's child.

"Erza's right honey, "Natsu patted his wife's shoulder.

"No…the forest is sad, they're crying…grieving…" Lillia sobbed. All of the guild members turned to Lilla and frowned in confusion. "What are you saying, Lil?"

"They're crying for the girl who's lost," Lillia said as she wiped a tear.

"It must be you then," Natsu joked. Everyone burst out in giggles and Lisanna gently picked Lillia up in her arms, smiling in agreement. She only shook her head vigorously and said, "No! It is for the girl who jumped down from the cliff. The yellow hair lady told me!" Lillia's eyes bore into Natsu and for a second, her crystal eyes turned into chocolate brown orbs. Then, the next moment, everything's back to normal. His eyes widened in realisation. He remembered.

"The lady…told me…that she was…lonely," Lillia mumbled before dozing off in Lisanna's arms. He remembered…Lucy.

**I'm terribly sorry for Lucy's fans! But i felt that this should how the story be ended. I wanted to put Lucy and Natsu together but it seemed kina wrong. :) You can kill me if you want to :p But i hope you all enjoy this story, i cried while writing it. T.T**


	2. Squeal?

**Hi guys! This is Luna Vaile again :) This story was meant to be a one-shot but is it possible that you all want a squeal for this? Well i'm all ears, if you all want i can make it into NaLu or NaLi. Depends on what my readers think...but i can say that NaLi is going to be angst. for Lisanna and NaLu is going to be angst. for Natsu. **

**This story can be created for a happy ending or not...If you all want a squeal, i'll write about an event which will cause Natsu to go back in time to make amends (NaLu) or Lisanna's P.O.V where Natsu is obsessed by Lucy's spiritual and she cannot take it any longer. Either way, it's angst for both stories :P**

**Your choice, i'll be waiting! :3**


End file.
